Why I Write About Sex, Kink and the Details That Make it Great

If asked, would you admit you own a vibrator, like being strapped to the bed or forcefully pushed around in the bedroom? How about the fact that you call your boyfriend daddy or feel sexy wearing your girlfriends' underwear?

Sex is a topic that’s rarely discussed. Details are off limits. We all know we have sex, we know we like it but we’re taken over by a shy uncomfortableness when asked to elaborate.

Sex is private. 

Admitting you love sucking cock is a big no-no. Sharing techniques is frowned upon. Basically, liking anything that’s outside “the norm” is sure to shun you into a lonely limbo where you’ll die alone and rejected.

But we want to know the story. As humans, we like to compare and learn and understand. We’re curious and horny and repressed. (I think 50 shades proved that point a few million times over.)

 

So what do we do?

I’ve spoken to many, many people on my swap over to sex positivity and each comes with a story of shame and fear. A part of them that they were too afraid to share. A part of them that they feared would be judged and rejected. So they turned against themselves. They hid their inclinations. Denied a part of themselves that they actually enjoyed.

These stories have come with a happy ending though. 

After years of torturing themselves, they began to accept themselves and their proclivities. They found an outlet in the kink community and found others who share their interests. They came to understand that they’re not the only people who enjoy what they enjoy. And they’ve come to accept themselves in all their wonderful weirdness.

Because there is an outlet. The conversation has started. It’s just that the memo hasn’t been passed around to everyone yet.

 

There's power in information.

My strongest belief is that people should not be afraid to be who they are. I write about sex because I agree with sex positivity and I like writing. But I also write about sex because I want to be one of the many voices that speak about things not spoken about. I want to be in the conversation where sluts don’t exist and people aren’t afraid to be who they are. 

 

So I write. 

I write to add to the discussion. To share my experiences and the things I’ve learned. To ask questions, find the answers and share.

I write about sex because it’s fascinating to me. I love kink, I love BDSM, I love people and dynamics and honesty.

I write about sex because that’s who I am and I believe in the underdog winning.